Can someone give advice about my b*stard of a neighbour (sorry, that's how I feel!)?

Posted under Home gardening advice | 20 Comments

I live next door to a very cantankerous oldish man & ends up arguing with all the neighbours. Anyway, we had some very strong winds in January, which blew down the fence separating both our properties. As it's his side & his responsibility to mend it, 4 months later he decides he's going to fix it himself. He never approaches anyone about anything he's going to do. He never answers his door, if we need to discuss anything with him, so it's only until I get home from work, that I see what he gets up to in his garden. Long story short, he has dug 4 big holes in the ground to make posts for the new fence & has decided to dump all the mud from the ground onto my lawn instead of keeping it on his side. He's extremely ignorant & unapproachable and I don't know what to do. He hasn't even mentioned when he's going to do a new fence and now we've got clumps of soil on our lawn. He's taking his time with the fence & the 'clumps' have been there for a week now & I do need to cut the lawn.

just do it the easy way take a rake and a shovel and go move the dirt onto his property , reseed the dead spots that he killed and be done with it. hopefully he will have the fence done soon enough and you can get back to your own life.

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20 Responses to “Can someone give advice about my b*stard of a neighbour (sorry, that's how I feel!)?”

  1. nicemanvery Says:

    Tip it back in the hole , he'l soon sort it then !!
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  2. blonde_warrior_2007 Says:

    write him an official letter, take a copy of the letter before you send it , and post it registered post so tehre is a record of you sending it, explaining everything in an official manner and asking for a response from him in writing within so many days or you will be taking legal action.
    * he didnt approach you first to discuss this
    * the dirt he has put onto your lawn needs removing at once
    etc etc etc

    and get your camera out now and start taking photos of the fence and the dirt hes dumped on your property and continue to take photos of everything thats hes doin re the fence
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  3. Wiz Says:

    Write to him send it recorded keep a copy ask him to move his soil off your property give him a reasonable amount of time say 2 weeks if he doesn't respond seek legal action and take a copy of your original letter to the solicitor/ citizens advice
    Good Luck I to had a neighbour from hell but I turned the tables (via my solicitor) and she moved £500 well spent.
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  4. lilian c Says:

    place the clumps back in his garden, maybe its a trip to the local councl to let them know? or you could ask if he needs help with the fence and then you never know he may be waiting for help?
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  5. caroline1409f1 Says:

    How about moving half of it back to his side? Take responsibility for half and give him half back – whether it's all his or not, surely 50:50 cannot cause an argument? Perhaps push a note through his door saying what you've done and why and that you'd appreciate him keeping the mess on his side of the garden? Say if he needs to come into your garden to do any of the work, while you don't mind, you could appreciate him telling you in advance? Good communication, or at least the attempt of it, could help the situation here. Good luck.
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  6. Tinkz Says:

    My be you should offer to put up the fence for him , it will probably end up saving you money and time, i hate annoying neighbours, i got some too but mine are moving soon thank god, i just hope my next ones are nicer not worse. Good luck with the cantankerous old codger. lol xxx
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  7. Foo Says:

    Get your shovel and heap it on his side.
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  8. jdtw13 Says:

    either put it back in the holes or get the spade and throw it around his garden spreading it out. that will pee him off as that will be harder to pick it back up and make his garden full of earth instead of grass. he should hurry up and pick it up and get the message when it rains or he will have his precious garden turned into mud. lol
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  9. greybeard Says:

    Here is a bit of advise, send him a letter, keep it cool and stick to the facts, don't, be argumentative or confrontational. Obviously, keep a copy for yourself, Explain that you have tried to communicate with him, but have failed, THEN, end with a threat to seek legal advice, as all other communication has failed. This worked for me. It's cheaper than a solicitors letter, in fact, my solicitor suggested that I do it myself.
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  10. BhitchyPrincess Says:

    "He never approaches anyone about anything he's going to do. He never answers his door, if we need to discuss anything with him"

    Why should he? It's HIS fence.

    Why would he need to discuss anything with you?

    Why should he be on your time schedule?

    The only valid complaint you have is the dirt on your lawn. Politely tell him that the dirt has to be moved. If he is elderly offer to help him, so that you can go about your business with cutting your lawn.

    By the way did he have the fence installed or is it his responsibility because the wind blew the fence on his side of the property line?

    You posted this question
    " I'm a quiet, shy person and I go to church (I'm a christian – yes one of those!) smile. Seriously though, "

    Your words and attitude don't appear very Christian like.
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  11. Jacks036 Says:

    Sorry but I think we all have at least one of those. Like they say, living near people is like being in a loveless marriage.
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  12. Meg Says:

    Get over it! You are making a too big of a deal about clumps of mud. Wow, if I stressed over something as piddly as that I would be a nervous wreck! I would calm down about this situation though. It doesn't seem to be that big of a deal to me. The only thing about the situation that is bad is your neighbor. He needs to handle things better and learn to communicate with all the neighbors about things like this. It would help you all out in the long run and maybe then you wouldn't be stressing over some mud. 😛
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  13. Vinny Says:

    Buy a cat and teach it to shit on his lawn
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  14. funny_smartlovely Says:

    if hes an old man on a pension maybe hecant afford to replace the fence. but growing up next to the neighbours from hell my mother put a fence up on our side of the boundary and then they put one on theirs. so maybe this is what you should do. itll take a foot at the very most of your garden but whats that compared to your privacy and peace of mind. As for the clumps put them back in the holes or on his side. Unfortunately when the neighbours are this old theres no getting through to them. good luck
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  15. ginger Says:

    i would dump it all back on his side. no more mister nice guy, if he is awkward give him some back. i would then putmy own fence up. 22 meters is the max height allowed and then you can put a trellis on top. run it along side his boundary. you may lose an inch or so but it would be worth it.
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  16. bluegirl Says:

    Why such a big song and dance about a bit of soil . Surely the easiest way of dealing with him is to make him into a friend. Ask him if he would like some help with the fence. If he is oldish he might find it difficult to do on his own. He might just be cantankerous because he is lonely.

    I have lived next door to people who were supposedly "difficult" and never found them to be so. It all comes down to how you approach them. Some people like to feel important and asking them their advice before you do something (even though you don't need it ) makes them feel that you look up to them and they then tend to be more open to what you are planning to do.
    Just being friendly can go a long way to making a neighbour better.
    You say hes ignorant and unapproachable but every body is approachable its just finding the right way to approach him. And are you sure hes not deaf.? I am deaf and I always explain this to people as otherwise they think I am an "ignorant stuck up cow" that is what one person called me. She apologised once I explained that I simply just hadn't heard her .
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  17. ROY B Says:

    I would pop a letter through his door advising him that you are considering legal action,The thought of having to fork out for his actions may be enough.
    If this dos'ent work send a solicitors letter,if you are in the right you cant lose.
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  18. Clive Says:

    While the various suggestions that you write to your neighbour with an ultimatum are undoubtedly the correct formal procedure, I think you must be a bit more pragmatic.

    A letter would probably just annoy your neighbour and cause him to become more obnoxious. The legal follow up could be quite costly if you used a solicitor and if further provoked, your neighbour may try to make you life quite miserable. I fear that if you adopt a confrontational approach, your quiet disposition and size 8 frame will not provide adequate back up.

    Much as it rankles, I fear that you must instead use charm. Go and see this chap and play the damsel in distress, be really nice and offer to help him finish the fence. It will leave a bad taste in the mouth but it may provide the quickest solution.

    An acquaintance in East London had a problem with a big, aggressive neighbour and after many arguments went to see him and laid the law down. The neighbour was just sarcastic, saying "What you gonna do about it?"
    The reply was "Me, nothing but I have £500 in my pocket and for that, I know two blokes from Canning Town who will come round here and keep kicking you until I tell them to stop"
    Hostilities ceased at once. Sad but that is the only language some people understand.
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  19. Groid Says:

    Could you make use of the soil elsewhere in your garden? if not then I'd explain you need to cut your lawn and the clumps are preventing this. If he doesn't answer his door, I'd put a polite note through his door stating that you intend to mow your lawn at the weekend and that if the clumps are not removed from your property by then you will have no option but to place the spoil back into the holes. Ask him to refrain from dumping this back on your property in future.

    Neighbours can be right fu£ers !
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  20. gands4ever Says:

    just do it the easy way take a rake and a shovel and go move the dirt onto his property , reseed the dead spots that he killed and be done with it. hopefully he will have the fence done soon enough and you can get back to your own life.
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